Caring about others is not a curse

Make peace and thrive with your authentic self

Photo by Tina Rolf on Unsplash

It is a cold and lonely place to live. As the massive waves pounded relentlessly on the surrounding jagged rocks, the tiny lighthouse looked lost and fearful as if a rogue wave will one fateful day slam into its weathered frame and obliterate it from existence. Unknown, unseen and unappreciated, it tenaciously clung to its foundation.

Driven with the need to always keep the peace, people pleasers confine themselves to that dark, cold, lonely place. Fearful of the tides of human emotions that pound them daily, they cling to foundations build on fear lest others find them wanting and reject them. Their identity is emotionally tied to the opinion of others as they staunchly hide their own agendas in favour of invisibility.

I understand this all too well. People-pleasing is my blood type and a perceived curse that I have come a long way in making peace with. Most of my younger years was spent in search of being the most inconspicuous, imperceptible martyr around. My self esteem was so low that it could not register on the Richter scale. I took everything personally and what everyone else needed to be happy, far out weighted anything I needed. Basically, I created a life where I mastered the role of victim.